Happy where I am

I’m really happy where I am. I can be looking for a place, and not knowing if it’s where I’m supposed to be. But I’m not and I’m happy now.

How do I know? I can sleep at night. I feel comfortable, I’m not thinking of other places I’d rather be. My home is cozy. It’s where my loved ones are. It’s simple, but so many people take their home surroundings for granted.

When I was fourteen, my family was homeless. If you’ve been there, as one of the many people who have not had a place to call their own, you know my life was pretty sucky. As a teenager it was especially hateful, but we managed to put that period behind us when my family moved into my grandparents’ home where we stayed for many years.

But still, it was someone else’s place. It took many years for me to feel settled. Feeling settled is important to supporting my emotional stability. But were the long periods of rootlessness better for my intuitive growth?

Did the constant wondering and reaching out psychically into the unknown make my intuitive skills stronger? Did nightly meditations in an effort to calm myself when I would otherwise be crying strengthen my insight? I was always a child with a rich imagination, but intuition isn’t imagining. It’s receiving answers to questions... it’s precognition of situations of which you may not yet be aware.

As an adult, that uneasy gut feeling I had when I met a certain woman felt strange at the time. Several years later, I decided to associate with that person and it turned out to be a very challenging time. Now that I’m more in awe of intuition, I doubt that kind of event would happen again. If I feel uneasy, not “at home” with a person, place or an idea, I will honor that observation.

I’m grateful that I know what feeling at home feels like.